Random Thoughts

I went to the RE this week to have my progesterone tested, because it's been 12 weeks since the D&C and no AF in sight. P4 was 12.4, so I did ovulate, and they said to wait it out another couple of weeks and see what happens. I am scared of AF, I'm sure it's going to be the mother bitch of all periods after all this time.

Remember my green-eyed monster post? I was right that she was pregnant, but she is about to miscarry. Sigh. Another victim of the Infertility Gods and their evil plans to prevent us from having children. At least in her case she already has a daughter so it's not quite as traumatic. I'm not belittling anyone's pain or trying to get into a pissing contest, but I think losing a baby after repeated IVF cycles when you can't just try again is very different from already having a kid, or getting pregnant easily and miscarrying. Those women know they can try again, or choose to be content with their one child. I don't have that option.

Then there's the deal with my cousin. When I was pregnant, she wanted to throw me a shower and was all gung-ho about it. I figured I can still have a shower pre-placement, because we need baby things. I emailed her almost a month ago and asked her about the shower, when the timing would be good for her, etc, and still haven't heard back. I don't want to have to write again, I want her to offer, and to be excited about it. I guess I just want to be treated like any woman expecting a child, because I am expecting a child.

I did buy primer yesterday to get the wall ready in the nursery, and I'm going to paint it this weekend. Tomorrow morning I'm going to go pick out acrylic paint for the mural, and I'm excited to be getting started!