The green-eyed monster

I have this friend who is trying to get pregnant with her second child. She had number one at age 39, her first month off the Pill. Number two has been a little more work, but she went to my RE and did an injectible/IUI cyle, and I think she's knocked up. She had a beta last week, and when David saw her yesterday, he asked how it went. She said she was still waiting on the results. I figure if it were negative she would have told him, so that can only mean one thing: repeat beta. So I guess if I were to follow my girlfriends, and wait until I'm 40 and do an injectible/IUI cycle, I should get pregnant pretty easily. Damn, wish I had known that before I spent all this money on IVF!

Am I jealous? Of course I am. I realize that the feelings I have towards her (or my sister-in-law, or any other Fertile person) aren't really directed at them, but rather at myself. I hate myself for not being able to get pregnant when it's so easy for other people.